INXS - Elegantly Wasted (Mercury, 1997)

INXS - Elegantly Wasted
Wan, tall, sexy gent dies.



Notes

1. We regret to inform you that INXS vocalist Michael Hutchence was found dead in a Sydney hotel room seven months after the release of this album.

Morrissey - Kill Uncle (EMI, 1991)

Morrissey - Kill Uncle
Sullen limey rock, sir!



Notes

1. Alternative anagram: I'm sulky loner's relic.

Rod Stewart - Vagabond Heart (Warner Bros., 1991)

Rod Stewart - Vagabond Heart
Another broad gets a VD wart!

Sting - Mercury Falling (A&M, 1996)

Sting - Mercury Falling
Smug, canting frillery.

Marilyn Manson - Portrait of an American Family (Nothing, 1998)

Marilyn Manson - Portrait of an American Family
Yo! I'm a man in alt-porn mascara. My final frontier!



Notes

1. Alternative anagram: My familiar form o' inanity can alarm no parents.

Sonic Youth - Screaming Fields of Sonic Love (DGC, 1995)

Sonic Youth - Screaming Fields of Sonic Love
I.e., DGC cash in on noisy fools' leftover music.

Sting - Ten Summoner's Tales (A&M, 1993)

Sting - Ten Summoner's Tales
Smugness. Sentimental rot.

Smash Mouth - Fush Yu Mang (Interscope, 1997)

Smash Mouth - Fush Yu Mang
Oh my! Smug U.S. fat man. Hush!

Pete Townshend - Psychoderelict (Atlantic, 1993)

Pete Townshend - Psychoderelict
Why, he did rotten concept LPs! See?

Alanis Morissette - Supposed Former Infatuation Junkie (Maverick, 1998)

Alanis Morissette - Supposed Former Infatuation Junkie
Spiritual pretensions run amok. Just ease me off to India!

Pearl Jam - Yield (Epic, 1998)

Pearl Jam's Yield
A lady jeers: "Limp!"

Ringo Starr - Time Takes Time (Private Music, 1992)

Ringo Starr - Time Takes Time
Geriatrist's item. No market!

Grateful Dead - Without a Net (Arista, 1990)

Grateful Dead - Without a Net
"A new tale of drug death," I tut.



Notes

1. "Drug death": Immediately after the tour commemorated on this album, keyboardist Brent Mydland died of a drug overdose.

Petra - Beyond Belief (DaySpring Records, 1990)

Petra - Beyond Belief
Drab. Feeble. No piety!



Notes

1. "No piety": That would explain a lot.

Hole - Pretty on the Inside (Caroline, 1991)

Hole - Pretty on the Inside
They do heroin, pen titles.

Mötley Crüe - Generation Swine (Elektra, 1997)

Mötley Crüe - Generation Swine
Yo! Get Mr. Neil so we can reunite.



Notes

1. During the recording of this album, the members of Mötley Crüe were pressured into reuniting with disgraced former bandmate Vince Neil. Mr. Neil replaced John Corabi, who later sued the band for fraud, slander and breach of contract.

Masonna - Mademoiselle Anne Sanglante (Alchemy, 1993)

Masonna - Mademoiselle Anne Sanglante Ou Notre Nymphomanie Aureole
A noise man annoys, man! A monument to ear damage (one he'll sell in Europe).

Santana - Sacred Fire: Live in South America (London, 1993)

Santana - Sacred Fire: Live in South America
Fierce Andeans rate it: «¡Ah, musica sin valor!»



Notes

1. "Musica sin valor": Worthless music.

Linda Ronstadt - Canciones de Mi Padre (Asylum, 1990)

Linda Ronstadt - Canciones de Mi Padre
A rancid disc en Español! A rotted mind.

Steve Perry - For the Love of Strange Medicine (Next Plateau Entertainment, 1994)

Steve Perry - For the Love of Strange Medicine
Fey vocalist retried themes of proven genre.



Notes

1. Alternative anagram: Fey star hopes to revive derelict genre on FM.