Tori Amos - Abnormally Attracted to Sin (Universal Republic, 2009)

Tori Amos - Abnormally Attracted to Sin
Narrator's also committed to banality.

Carly Simon - The Bedroom Tapes (Arista, 2000)

Carly Simon - The Bedroom Tapes
Cool part? My bed's in a rest home!

Regurgitate - Carnivorous Erection (Relapse, 2000)

Regurgitate - Carnivorous Erection
Generic ire. Gratuitous art on cover.

Sonic Youth - Kali Yug Express + More (Geffen, 2002)

Sonic Youth - Kali Yug Express + More
To "heroes": Your playing + mixes suck!

Stephen Malkmus and the Jicks - Real Emotional Trash (Matador, 2008)

Stephen Malkmus and the Jicks - Real Emotional Trash
Some hipster jerks: "Ah, let's make that dull man an icon!"



Notes

1. Alternative anagram: Hipster teens liked a no-talent jackal's ho-hum smarm.

Sting - Sacred Love (A&M, 2003)

Sting - Sacred Love
Giant clod's verse.

Gary Glitter - On (Gary Glitter, 2001)

Gary Glitter - On
Girl, ten, at orgy.



Notes

1. "Girl, ten": As  Wikipedia explains, "On 2 March 2006 Glitter was tried on charges of committing obscene acts with two girls, aged 10 and 11, facing up to 14 years in prison if convicted. The following day he was found guilty and sentenced to three years in prison."

Janis Joplin - The Woodstock Experience (Legacy Recordings, 2009)

Janis Joplin - The Woodstock Experience
J.J., on LP set: "Pot! Acid! Coke! Heroin! Sex! Wine!"

Rod Stewart - Once In a Blue Moon: The Lost Album (Rhino Handmade, 2009)

Rod Stewart - Once In a Blue Moon: The Lost Album
Brothel: "No anal!"
Me, later: "But I use two condoms!"

Mötley Crue - Carnival of Sins Live (Mötley, 2006)

Mötley Crue - Carnival of Sins Live
Fire Mr. Vince "Lousy at Vocals" Neil!



Notes

1. Alternative anagram: Vince Neil's racy, frivolous metal.

Franz Ferdinand - You Could Have It So Much Better (Domino, 2005)

Franz Ferdinand - You Could Have It So Much Better
Viz., by not hearin' the tunes from our CD. A fecal dud!

Sonic Youth - The Eternal (Matador, 2009)

Sonic Youth - The Eternal
O, I hate Thurston, Lee, NYC!

Fiona Apple - Extraordinary Machine (Clean Slate/Epic, 2005)

Fiona Apple - Extraordinary Machine
Prolix NY maiden at her piano. A farce!

Sleater-Kinney - The Woods (Sub Pop, 2005)

Sleater-Kinney - The Woods
Late heroines to NW dykes.



Notes

1. We're pleased to be able to report -- for once -- that "late" in this context is simply a synonym for "recent."

Sonic Youth - Murray Street (DGC, 2002)

Sonic Youth - Murray Street
Hey, your art-music's rotten!

The Killers - Sam's Town (Island, 2006)

The Killers - Sam's Town
Mawkish. Rotten. Sells!

The Clash - The Essential Clash (Epic, 2003)

The Clash - The Essential Clash
Heh. Cheats can sell stale shit!

Michael McDonald - Blue Obsession (Ramp, 2000)

Michael McDonald - Blue Obsession
Imbecile's secondhand solo album.

Eric Clapton - Back Home (Duck/Reprise, 2005)

Eric Clapton - Back Home
"I cheat poor black men." --C

The Flaming Lips - Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots (Warner Bros, 2002)

The Flaming Lips - Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots
O, hipsters are smitten with LP by fribbling Oklahoma stoners!



Notes

1. This title was suggested by an anonymous reader.